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But when it was revealed that friends did, in fact, like their friends of the opposite sex, the women felt that this fact had far more bearing than the men did.
The men shrugged it off while the women dwelled on it.
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, a book about love and nihilism, Milan Kundera posits that “flirting is the promise of sexual intercourse without a guarantee.” That’s true — at least get some of the signals right.
Flirting can also just be an awkward preface to eat dollar pizza by oneself or a way to complicate work relationships or a way to make a friendship less cozy. The simple reason for this is that humans, gifted and cursed by the concept of subtlety, aren’t good at flirting.
Studies have shown that humans are “very poor perceivers of intended flirtatiousness” — and thanks to shared fear of rejection, dissembling doesn’t do anyone any favors.
Heterosexual couples can partly blame evolution for their terrible job at reading social cues.
It’s an agreed upon fact among academics that men over-perceive women’s sexual intent to make sure they’re not missing out on any mating opportunities.